What the heck is going on around here?

Well, Baby M has had his vision checked and could possibly need glasses! I can't imagine he would leave them on his face if this proves to be the case. It seems that just one eye has poor vision and of course they don't want that eye to get lazy. He is on his 5th ear infection for the year so he will be getting tubes sometime soon. Flippity has been in karate for the past year, and has now decided that he doesn't want to do it anymore. We decided not to force him, because I don't want him to hate going. My summer school class (Microbiology) is proving to be a joke. Nothing against young instructors, but this one just turned 25 and is a total pushover. She really wants everyone in the class to get an A, so she's making it so just shy of letting us use our notes on the ridiculously simple exams. I think the next one may include a photo of Elmo for us to identify (just pure speculation). My sister, neighbor, and friend of mine (all separate people) are doing a fitness bootcamp 5 days per week for 4 weeks. It has kicked my butt this past week. It starts at 5:30am, so of course, I don't have to worry about where the boys will go. Isn't that crazy that if mothers of small children want to exercise (or do anything for that matter on our own) we have to get up before the sun or do it in the dead of night. That same rule doesn't seem to apply to dads for some reason... We have a new camera that we are trying out, so all my pictures are stuck on there until I have time to figure out how to upload them.

The Sad Reality of Adoption

I have been following a blog of a fabulous family for years. I watched them receive their first referral for an amazing baby girl from Ethiopia a couple years ago, and now their second referral for a 2 month old beautiful baby girl last week. The second baby that was referred to them has now passed away. I can't imagine the overwhelming sadness that lives in their house right now. These children are so precious, so innocent, so fragile. A common reason why these birth mothers want so desperately for their child to go to a family that can afford to feed them. Something as simple as food and water. Something we, as Americans, take for granted. The most basic need of the human body is water. When a child gets ill because of dehydration, it seems so simple to fix. Not the case in Ethiopia. Pray for these children and families facing this situation.

All the things I love about my boys...

Flippity:

He is a tenderhearted child who genuinely cares how others are feeling.
He is generally a good listener and helper.
He can stick with a task and see it through.
He loves me and seeks me as comfort.
I usually don't have to worry about what he is doing.
He has a great sense of humor.
He has an amazing memory.
He is very well behaved (compared to most children).
He is a good friend to others.
He is an interesting child.

Baby M:

He has a fun sense of humor.
He can do it himself and will.
He is very independent.
He is not afraid to try new physical things.
He has a fabulous laugh and smile.
He is always busy.
He is loves his mama.
Others are drawn to him.
He is a perfect child (usually) in the presence of new people.
He knows what he wants and is not afraid to ask for it.

We are learning to take the good with the bad, a lesson that needs constant refreshing, and learning to look past the muck and enjoy what we have. Babies are hard, thats all there is to it. But if you let the 'hard' be dominant, you'll never enjoy the stuff you should.

Angry Baby

Just what do you do with an angry baby? Anybody? Baby M (disregard his angelic, happy little face) is mad. If anyone takes something from him he throws a tantrum. Turning off the water in the bath, picking him up when he is in the wrong place, taking something from him that he should not have... all these things cause him to beat on me. He will throw things at me (very hard), and pound on me in anger. Once again, this is like being a first time mom. I do not know how to deal with a child like this. It seems like a 1 year old child should not have this much rage. What do I do, and how do I change this behavior in him? Is it even possible? Baby M will even throw food at the table out of spite. He will look me in the eye, after I have told him it is naughty, and throw the food anyway. I am very certain that he understands 'No' and 'Naughty'. He is a smart child and I think this is only the tip of the iceberg as far as us butting heads will go. Somebody HELP!

Happy Birthday Baby M!

1 year old today...

The Beautiful Eyes of My Boys

Don't they have the most amazing eye color?

The answer is... teeth

The question is... what emerges in a baby's mouth starting around 6 months of age? Baby M is pushing 12 months old and only has 2 teeth! What the heck?! Flippity didn't get a single tooth until he was 10 months old, but when he started getting them they all came very quickly. Baby M got 2 teeth at 7 months and here we are. No real evidence that there are more on the way either. We keep blaming his heightened crabbiness on teething, but then again we've been blaming his crabbiness on teething for the past 8 months. I refuse to believe that I have kid with a crabby personality. It just won't work.

On the topic of Flippity, he has been jumping over hurdles in life like a champ. He is 5 years old. He has recently learned how to tie his shoes, and ride a 2 wheeled bike! Tonight during karate he was invited to test for his blue belt. The belt rank is white, yellow, orange, purple, blue, etc. You must demonstrate that you know certain things at each belt level. It took him almost 1 year to reach purple belt from orange. He has only had the purple for 1 month! They said he's the first ever in the 'tot' class to move up to blue belt that quickly. It is because he has a great memory and can recite the complex combinations so well.

Are we there yet?

I. Am. Tired.

I am ready to do the cry-til-you-fall-asleep thing with baby M. Perhaps he's getting more teeth. Perhaps another ear infection. Whatever it is that disturbs his little soul at all hours of the night, is making me insane. For awhile I thought we were on the right track. We were both getting sleep, albeit in his bed, but we were both sleeping. I am so tired of being kicked in the stomach and punched in the eyes by flailing hands for hours on end. During the day he's like a baby koala. He clings to me all the time. He must be picked up, then he must be put down (repeat). He can't seem to do anything alone. I can't walk to the bathroom by myself or he has a major meltdown. If anyone has had a child like this, when does it change?

Rockin the 'hawk!

Baby M's hair is a mohawk that stands about 3 inches high. There is no static involved. The mohawk of the baby simply defies gravity. Most people ask us how we get it to stand up like that. Everything is going well here. Not much to report. Baby M is nearly 10 months old.

The Injera Experiment

For those of you who may not know what injera is welcome to the injera experiment. Injera is a sour tasting flexible flat bread that is used as a utensil to eat food and looks much like a crepe. It's main ingredient is from a grass crop that readily grows in Ethiopia called teff. I have never had injera before, but have wanted to try if for a long time. Since we'll be bringing a child home from Ethiopia (sometime in my 30's) I thought I'd try to make it. There are so many different recipes for injera I came to the conclusion you can just make up you own. I did it the 'traditional' way the first batch and let it ferment for 3 days with the help of some yeast. I wasn't sure if it was ready to cook, but I forged ahead anyway. The result, very sour injera. The second batch, I found a recipe for on someones blog (faux injera). This one didn't use teff flour just wheat and white. The texture was the same as 'authentic' injera but not at all sour. The third batch I made, I used the teff flour again but did not let it ferment at all. I just mixed it up and cooked it. This one tasted different than the regular flour injera, but not sour. The conclusion: I do not like really fermented injera, but the 2nd and 3rd batch were not at all sour. SO... next time I think I will let the mixture ferment only slightly and try it.

Heading in the right direction

Several good things are happening here. Baby M is starting to sleep at night thanks to the really expensive formula. He has 2 teeth now and can crawl. He is slooooowly starting to become less clingy. Flippity is registered for Kindergarten in the fall and will begin to ride the bus home from his morning class soon. We have been 'waiting' one month for our baby girl. I have been accepted to the nursing program for the fall. Hopefully I will be able to finish the classes before we have to go get her, but if not that's O.K. too. The Big Guy just got his big raise, and now we can afford to live from paycheck to paycheck without robbing Peter to pay Paul. Finally, our taxes are done. Here's some new stuff to look at.

Yes, I look just like my daddy!

Wait Date = 12/31/07

The agency granted us the wait date of 12/31/07 as long as we got them the new letter of reference ASAP. It was in their hands as of yesterday morning. The expected time frame is 14 - 18 months as of now. Surely it will increase. The longest waiter for an infant girl has been waiting for 15 months now. I think those particular referrals have been taking at least 16 months.

Baby M turns 1 in 4 months. I cannot believe it! He is still not sleeping through the night. The new doc. is having us try a new formula. It's hypoallergenic (Enfamil Nutramigen). Just for a comparison the formula we have been buying (I am not a formula snob) costs us $14 for a 26 oz can. This new stuff costs $27 for a 16 oz can. I know we cannot afford to keep him on the stuff, but we are trying it for a week to see if it makes any difference. Unfortunately, he does seem to be sleeping better (so it must be working). We are pushing the baby food, so he learns to eat solids faster. If he's not so dependent on the formula, maybe he will do better - I don't know. The thought behind this new formula is that he has a sensitivity to the proteins in the milk and soy based formula. The nutramigen is milk based, but something in it prohibits the protein to break apart in the digestive tract causing less of a system irritation. So obviously I should have just breastfed the kid. What was I thinking trying to get my body back to myself - how selfish!

Randomness...

Baby M has a tooth that has popped through the skin. He is doing well. He's almost ready to crawl, I think we may have to get a corral when this happens. Flippity amazes me everyday. He is a great 5 year old boy who is sensitive to most everyones feelings at all times. I wish all parents could have one child like him. I am exhausted. Just from life in general. I got an A in my A&P class. The second half of it starts Jan 15. I wish I loved to learn the way I do now 10 years ago.

Adoption news: CIS approval as of 12/31. For those who may not know all the fun stuff about the process - in our agency the dossier AND CIS (fingerprint) approval must be done before you can get on the waiting list for a referral. Our dossier was sent Dec.10. The normal time frame for reviewing a dossier is 7-10 days. We got a call saying that the dossier had been approved, and we were just waiting for the fingerprint approval. So we got the CIS form in the mail and I faxed it right over (loving in my mind that we were now on the wait-list as of 12-31). I faxed it yesterday 1-4-08. We got an e-mail later in the day stating that one of our reference letters (written by my sister) was no good. Evidently reference letters must be from a non-family member. Does it state this in the instructions? Oh no. My last dossier included a reference letter from the same person - no problem. So to wrap it up, now our dossier is NOT complete or accepted so we are NOT on the waiting list. I asked a good friend to write a letter, and I know she will do it ASAP. It's just that one day difference on the wait list equals a month for a referral, in most cases. So imagine what an extra week means. I know there is nothing I can do about it. It makes me mad that somebody drops the ball when I have worked so hard and furiously to make sure all bases are covered. Not to mention what these people are being paid to do their job. Do you think they could make an exception in our case since it took them nearly 3 weeks to find the issue in the dossier? Who knows, I have yet to get up the courage to e-mail bring this issue to their attention.

Bye Bye Amby Baby

The amby baby has been re-sold on e-bay. We recovered most of the money it cost to buy. Pink eye has been the illness of the week around here. You can't just get an antibiotic for it anymore either. You have to wait to see how it plays out. Does your child wake with his eyes glued shut? For 2 days? Do you have to wipe green goo from his eyes every 20 minutes? For 2 days? If you answered yes to ALL these questions then a trip to the doctor may be necessary. It is very unpleasant to have to deal with these symptoms occuring in a baby. We finally got the antibiotic ointment for his eyes friday, and by saturday his eyes were back to normal. As the Dr. put it 'his eyes look really gnarly'. That they did.

Tomorrow I will be sending out the dossier, I think. Not that it's a rush to get it in because the fingerprints must be approved before the dossier really does us any good. We have a fingerprint appointment on Dec. 14. We have to drive about 2 hours to get fingerprinted and it's been snowing like mad around here, so I am hoping that snow doesn't delay the process any further.

The big guy, who just recently finished his master's degree, is working as a nurse practitioner. This is equivalent to a physician assistant. He took a cut in pay going from a staff nurse to a nurse practitioner. Here is what the man is responsible for on a daily basis: doing rounds on patients in the morning to find out if there has been any change since the previous day, ordering tests on patients, prescribing medication for patients, diagnosing what is wrong with the patient, discharging patients with further medical instruction. Does any of this sound familiar? Sound like the job of a doctor perhaps? He gets paid 1/3 of what his colleagues as doctors get paid, and that just happens to be even less than a regular registered nurse. SAD, SAD, SAD. Fortunately, the hospital for which he works does not own the physician group that he works with AND they are going to 'buy' the group. That means that he is able to do some salary negotiating, and hopefully they will see the value in what he does. Don't get me wrong, I think nurses are paid pretty good. It's just that when you pay $30,000 to 'upgrade' your degree, and you are responsible for the same things a physician is you would think that would be worth some extra income.

I am almost finished with my A&PI class that I took an incomplete in last semester, then it's on to A&PII. Thankfully these classes are held at night, so I can attend while the big guy is home. I'll be able to start nursing classes in 1 year. Hopefully, we'll be able to work something out with the school when we get our referral.

Christmas Love:

Soy in, Amby Baby Out

Of course, the Amby Baby didn't last long. Why on earth would a $250 baby hammock be acceptable to a baby? He would much rather sleep in a $1200 king sized bed. A baby needs room, you know. I've accepted (surrendered) to the fact that my children just can't get enough of us. We're pretty likable people, I think. I just never thought that there would be beings in this world that would want to be glued to us 24 hours a day (5 year old included). We often times wake in the morning with 4 in the bed and the little one said "roll over, I'm crowded." So they all rolled over and the daddy fell out... you get the gist. On the other hand, we have switched the baby to soy formula. Did it make a huge difference? Not really, although, he is sleeping much better at night (I'll take whatever I can get - props to soy).

We will be ready to turn in our dossier next week. Still waiting for a letter from Immigration Services to let us know when our fingerprint date is. On the last round of adoption paperwork, we were O.K.'d to get fingerprinted before our homestudy was completed. Apparently this time the fingerprints will not be O.K.'d until they have the homestudy in their hands, which of course delays the whole process because we can't get our homestudy finalized until our physicals next week. UGH! We are looking at 18-24 months before we get a referral this time around. For some reason, our agency seems to be double the wait of others. But of course, keeping it all in perspective, it will happen at the right time for our family.

Can I rave about a product?

O.K. the Amby Baby hammock has arrived and is in use. At first baby M didn't like it at all. Mostly because IF I could even get him in it while he was still asleep, he was positioned so uncomfortably that he would wake almost immediately. It has been a slow process to learning the best way to put a sleeping child into a moving target. First, I pull the thing over to my bed and lay the hammock on the bed. Next, I lay the sleeping baby in the hammock and hold his body with my hands until he stops wrestling around. Then, I lift the hammock off the bed (which is attached to the frame) and allow him to rock back and forth for awhile. Seems to be working alright. Last night he slept, without waking, from 8:30 p.m. until 3:00 a.m. Perhaps just a fluke. I hate raving about products because the minute I do it stops working. So let's just say the vote isn't quite in yet but things are looking good. The Big Guy has been sick. Coughing-up-a-lung sick. He also has sleep apnea and needs a C-pap machine to sleep. Being congested and being required to breathe through your nose to use the machine is not compatible. So, he has been sleeping on the couch. I think that is one of the reasons baby M is sleeping so well. Let's just say the Big Guy is like a bull in a china closet.

On another note Flippity turned 5 yesterday. Makes me feel so old. He was in a great mood all day. We always have a huge party for him around his birthday for family. The party is this Sat. so he is very excited about that. We had a "dry run" last night when grandma and grandpa came for dinner and birthday cake. They brought their gifts, and he also opened ours. 5 is such a great age!

What Will We be for halloween?

The Amazing Spiderman and a puppy (costume compliments of Aunt E).

Still No Relief

The chiropractor has decided that she cannot help baby M. I can't say that it has made a great difference in his sleep. I feel like I'm getting more used to the fact that he will just be awake most of the night. Does this mean that my body has become a more efficient sleeper? Perhaps my body knows that restful sleep is few and far between so it sleeps great when it can. Anyway, we have one last trick up our sleeves, and if this doesn't work its going back on e-bay. Check out this link for the Amby Baby. If anyone has any experience with this good or bad please feel free to share. We haven't gotten it yet, but it sounds good in theory. Baby M is 5 months old now, he is a great joy to be around and still lots of work. He doesn't have to be held as much anymore, but only when he's well rested or entertained by Flippity will he sit by himself. He hates tummy time and lying on his back. He loves to give wide open mouthed baby kisses. He smiles all the time and is easy to make laugh. He is very interested in everything that is going on. His favorite person on earth, and the one he finds the most amusing is Flippity. He LOVES his bath at night, you'd think he was moving into Disney World by the way he lights up and gets excited.

On the adoption front, we have gotten the dossier instructions from the agency. Our homestudy needs to be updated, but not that much. I have requested my dossier back from the agency because they have all of my original documents some of which I could re-use instead of spending tons more money on new ones. I have yet to hear if this is possible.

Crack this

I took baby M to a chiropractor the other day. Why you ask? I was/am at wits end with what to do with this child. From one day to the next it's a complete mystery which I love for the most part, but really only on a good nights sleep. Recently I have been seeing every hour on the clock at night with him. He doesn't particularly want to eat, just be held. He is now sleeping in our bed as well. Not my preference, but seemingly the only choice. I can just roll him on his side when he begins to fuss and pat his butt rather than dragging my tired butt out of bed and rocking him endlessly in the chair just to do it again in another hour. So, I'll try anything to help this baby sleep. She adjusted his back in hopes that it would do wonders. Well that night he woke only to eat. A small victory in my opinion. We have discovered that we are parenting "attachment style" with him. I have also learned that this is the way to do it with an adopted child. Baby M is preparing us to parent an adopted child. If anyone denies seeing God's hand in this whole story, I beg to differ. Why did baby M have to come in the midst of our referral? Why couldn't he wait until after the adoption? Why, it was so that we'd know exactly what to do with our daughter from Ethiopia. And by the way, we are getting ready to re-apply to the program. I have asked God to slam the door without question on this adoption if it is not meant to be. So far, full speed ahead.

Could it be?

My child (baby M) has been diagnosed with acid reflux. I have to say I am a bit skeptical simply because many of the features of a high need baby are also symptoms of acid reflux. Fast forward... he has been on zantac for a week with no improvement at all. Improvement would constitute better sleep with longer stretches. Right now we're lucky if he sleeps for more than 2 hours at night without waking. Translation... one tired and crabby mama. I called the Dr. yesterday to update her on the lack of improvement and she prescribed a stronger med (prevacid). I am not expecting this drug to do miracles either, but am willing to try anything for more sleep. A dear friend of mine offered to take baby M yesterday so I could get some sleep. I let her take Flippity instead. He has been neglected through all of this because baby M is so much w0rk. God bless the child's heart for not getting resentful of his brother. Flippity just goes with the flow, and is satisfied with very little entertaining. We try very hard to do things just for him since he is such a good big brother. Flippity and Daddy are going to visit grandma this weekend by themselves. It's such a long car ride and baby M HATES being in the car. Even to go less than a mile to the grocery store we are blessed with his ear-piercing shrill. Sigh. I don't know how to handle this kid, but I'm learning new things daily.